Having experienced two hospital births with my first two children, I knew that I wanted something different when I found out I was pregnant with my third baby. I’m twenty-five and I’ve had two (now three!) complication free pregnancies, and the injuries I sustained from my second birth were entirely based upon my treatment at the hospital. I know that’s not how all hospital births go, since my first birth went beautifully, but now that I have had a home birth I can’t imagine a better way!

After having two babies I thought I knew everything there is to know about birth….but I did not! Morgann gave me so many pieces of great advice, like taking more magnesium and paying attention to my nutrient intake. From the beginning this relationship was less like a doctor informing me of what to do and more like having a coach, like the ancient sheela-na-gigs of Ireland who used their wisdom to guide young mothers through the birth experience. Every decision was mine to make, and Morgann was only there to offer her medical knowledge and support along the way.

For my third child, labor was far from what I expected. My first two births involved fast labors and a fairly smooth process from the first contraction to the final push. This labor began days before I held my baby in my arms, and it was a constant back-and-forth of nightly contractions that would stop with every sunrise. One day the contractions were so consistent that my husband went ahead and blew up the birthing tub and prepped our bed. My four and two year old had a blast using the tub as their new favorite playpen - if there is anything I would change about my birth story it would be to get a disposable liner for that tub so that we could’ve cleaned it out easier and kept it for the kids!

On the day that labor truly began I was uncertain at first, thrown off kilter by a week of sleepless nights and all of the stop-and-go. Still, I was experiencing back pain like I had never had before, so I texted Morgann when I started to have contractions and mentioned the back pain I’d been having for hours. She texted back if I thought it was back labor.

 I literally laughed. I had never considered the possibility but these cramps were killer and I knew that it had to be something. Part of me was deeply hopeful, and the rest of me was too exhausted to worry about it, so I canceled my meetings for the evening as a precaution and stayed home. I knew that whatever this was, labor or another series of practice contractions, it wasn’t urgent yet. So I told my husband that he was free to leave and take care of our commitments. He did, and when he came back the contractions were still going but still inconsistent. We went to bed but I woke up within a couple of hours with contractions that were coming really fast….less than two minutes apart…but they weren’t very strong. This had happened a couple of times already in the week but this time they didn’t go away, so I texted Morgann. After exchanging a few screenshots of my contraction timer and describing how they felt she decided to go ahead and come over. She checked me and decided that this could be labor but that I still had several hours to go, if it continued at all. So she went home, and I tried to get some sleep.

 Had it not been for those precious four hours of sleep  I do not know how the rest of the day would have gone. But, I got four hours and then the contractions woke me up again. Just as fast, just as consistent, but this time they were getting STRONG! I felt excited because I knew that I knew that I knew that this time was for real. Anthony, my wonderful husband, had been super antsy for almost two weeks since the contractions began, and even more so after my due date passed. So in addition to the tub being blown up, our bed was already prepped for birth and very hot due to the plastic lining…meaning neither one of us had as much sleep as we should have. When your midwife says don’t do that stuff too early….seriously don’t. Haha.

Once labor hit for real it hit hard and fast. And I was ready. I didn’t have to get in my car, I didn’t have to get dressed in something more travel appropriate. I just got to embrace every contraction in the way that I needed to. By seven in the morning my birth team had arrived and my children were starting to wake up. I still felt pretty good in-between contractions so I helped my two year old son get dressed and talked with my kids. Once the contractions got really strong Anthony took the kids downstairs where most of the peeps were waiting. I tried laboring over the toilet, and while I’m sure it sped things up it was a fight to stay there through each contraction. I remember after one particularly rough contraction my daughter walked into the bathroom and put her hand on my shoulder, looked me in the eyes, and with the sincerity and authenticity of a four year old said “You’re gonna be ok I’ma, you’re really strong.” And walked away. I cannot explain to you how special that moment was.

After that I labored in the shower, and Anthony applied counter pressure on my back which was sheer heaven. In recovery the sorest part of my body was actually the two spots on my back where he had been putting pressure. It was so. worth it.

Ultimately what stands out the most about  these moments is that we were free to do what we needed to do to have our baby. I got really loud which, thinking back, seems so weird because I didn’t do that with my first two and this birth felt less difficult than the first two. But I really believe I was able to let my body relax and fall back to instinct because I felt safe. I had my music blaring (heh, if top volume on an iphone counts…in the rush we didn’t find my speaker.), I was able to transition from my room to the backroom whenever I needed to, and I got to focus on bringing my daughter into the world. It was a fourteen hour labor, my longest yet, and by the time I was able to get in the birthing tub I was exhausted. From weeks of no sleep and absolutely no breaks between contractions I was out of my mind tired. Being in the water brought me a few minutes of sweet relief before the contractions hit harder than ever. Throughout the day Anthony brought me juice and electrolytes to stay hydrated. There was a point when the contractions hurt so much that I didn’t want anyone or anything touching me, and I don’t remember exactly when Anthony came into the tub with me. Our plan had been for him to catch our baby, as he caught both of the other two. But I was so exhausted, and I still had to push her out, so I ended up leaning into him and literally pulling from his strength and his energy. This is another memory I will treasure, because when I needed it the most Anthony was my steady anchor through the most difficult contractions just as I was ready to push.

My midwife was amazing, and almost completely hands off through most of it, but the second I needed help she was there. It sounds crazy but the worst part of pushing was that I got the worst charlie horse ever in my leg and in the bizarre mental state that happens during birth I panicked, thinking it was going to make me pass out like the cramps I used to get in high school. But my midwife was there, stretching my leg when I couldn’t move at all, and my husband had my back. So I made it through. No matter what kind of birth you are having, the actual act of pushing your baby out is simultaneously powerful, terrifying, and amazing. Everything feels like it is teetering between life and death, strength and helplessness, joy and pain. That’s when having your tribe there is the most empowering thing you could do. With Anthony supporting me, and my two and four year old right there with me to welcome her, Tziphora Hephzibah Prescott came into the world. Morgann caught her and scooped her into my arms, and Anthony and I were able to cradle her together for a few moments while she got her bearings. She was beautiful, and so calm.

 Getting OUT of the tub is always the most awkward part, as you feel very much like a newborn foal for a few minutes, but we figured it out. For the first time I didn’t tear and I will say that that feels SO GOOD!! Having only one baby where I didn’t tear it felt like I could just run and dance and go wild.  Of course that would be a terrible idea so soon after birth, so I settled for a hot shower. By the time I was done the bed had already been prepped and I was able to sit down and watch Morgann weigh my baby and do all of the checks and measurements that usually happen. She has the sort of tenderness and strength in her hands that I rarely see, even in mothers. My two and four year old were so fascinated with the baby. They were there for her birth, and while I don’t remember it, they were absolutely strengthened as siblings and as a family by the experience. When our midwife showed us the placenta, my daughter LOVED getting to see all the cool and fascinating things that kept her baby sister alive in the womb, although my son was just a little bit grossed out. Our “helper” was a wonderful eighty-two year old lady who had never seen a birth other than her own, and the experience made her an honorary grandmother to my children.

For Tziphora’s first day, she was held, she was loved, and we brought her here as a team. Even my little dude, at age two, sees birth as just a regular part of life. I can proudly say that aside from the physical act of birth, my husband did most of the work, and that’s exactly what he wanted as a father and husband.  My daughter is so confident, and she knows what she means when she says “birth is hard work! I’m going to have a baby someday too!”